{"product_id":"unidentified-coffee-t-shirt","title":"Unidentified Coffee T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eRecovered from the archive and approved for public wear. 👕 Constructed from 100% ring-spun Gildan 64000 cotton, because field operatives require comfort during extended low-velocity operations. 🛸 This unisex garment arrives pre-broken-in — the result of processes we are not authorized to disclose. 🔒 Heavyweight. Durable. Runs true to size, which is more than we can say for most recovered materials. 📦\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eManufactured, packaged, and dispatched within approved domestic channels 🇺🇸 by personnel who observe mandatory rest intervals at regular intervals throughout operations. ☕\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDoes not grant actual clearance. Wear responsibly. ⚠️\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Military Green \/ S","offer_id":56609529659718,"sku":"14851147436705311771","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ M","offer_id":56609529856326,"sku":"62792216967263053658","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ L","offer_id":56609530052934,"sku":"10404195213324364873","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ XL","offer_id":56609530249542,"sku":"13747199871728532251","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530446150,"sku":"18933030220336942351","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":56609530609990,"sku":"30975053249223964510","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 4XL","offer_id":56609530741062,"sku":"14752916308097845317","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ XS","offer_id":56609529528646,"sku":"29286439283763361264","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ S","offer_id":56609529561414,"sku":"10831928711301650992","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ M","offer_id":56609529758022,"sku":"26589627575869081310","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ L","offer_id":56609529954630,"sku":"21586393777855201271","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ XL","offer_id":56609530151238,"sku":"14330698692799094880","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530347846,"sku":"19338793196198294792","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 3XL","offer_id":56609530544454,"sku":"19009516296062725499","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 4XL","offer_id":56609530708294,"sku":"23216394595647051038","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charcoal \/ 5XL","offer_id":56609530773830,"sku":"23198595691345294117","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ S","offer_id":56609529594182,"sku":"10099452673916577716","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ M","offer_id":56609529790790,"sku":"25030283770960155034","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ L","offer_id":56609529987398,"sku":"18168096274191769988","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ XL","offer_id":56609530184006,"sku":"24054468225748790945","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530380614,"sku":"10104370668110788104","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Chocolate \/ 3XL","offer_id":56609530577222,"sku":"12846091423883357567","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":56609529626950,"sku":"27296833207304217013","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":56609529823558,"sku":"27876793377182286162","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":56609530020166,"sku":"22277048888599919231","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":56609530216774,"sku":"93364004421962902865","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530413382,"sku":"14796416854325887787","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S","offer_id":56609529692486,"sku":"22088432412603881190","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ M","offer_id":56609529889094,"sku":"23731601836823754984","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ L","offer_id":56609530085702,"sku":"17993577259920691366","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XL","offer_id":56609530282310,"sku":"33082326905767542191","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530478918,"sku":"39009573366129510790","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 3XL","offer_id":56609530642758,"sku":"33873891862317401006","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ S","offer_id":56609529725254,"sku":"42754036737126029900","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ M","offer_id":56609529921862,"sku":"20932478443179695971","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ L","offer_id":56609530118470,"sku":"26450151319568482354","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ XL","offer_id":56609530315078,"sku":"25753199841369099585","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 2XL","offer_id":56609530511686,"sku":"11767681062789438078","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 3XL","offer_id":56609530675526,"sku":"22110937115520746086","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0983\/5983\/6998\/files\/unidentified-coffee-t-shirt-5-947524a4-1964-4bc6-bc4d-ef14d1d8252d.webp?v=1782211195","url":"https:\/\/theilluminatee.com\/products\/unidentified-coffee-t-shirt","provider":"The Illuminatee","version":"1.0","type":"link"}